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Before Maggie could formulate either a strategy or an answer, Blairleapt to the rescue, quite literally, of "mommy". Bounding out of thechair, where Ms. Umbridge had decreed he "stay put and shut up", Blairdid his best, given his frail frame, to block the teacher's view of hismother. Thus interposed, he manfully assumed the entire blame for hiscrossdressing:It's unfair to blame my mother for the way I'm dressed or for myhaircut. She had no idea till now that I've started wearing girls'clothes to school. After all, I was able to fool even you, MissUmbridge, for a couple of days. Anyhow, I'm the only one who's everwanted me to be a girl. No, I didn't say that right. It's not that Iwant to become a girl; it's that I was one from the moment I was born. But I didn't have the balls to take my girls' clothes out of the closetuntil now. Yes, Ms. Umbridge, I am a transsexist, a girl born in aboy's body. So it's not fair to blame my mother for God's fuck-up."Blair," Maggie said sharply,. So tell him! But how? Words are best: nothing like an e-mail or a quick phone call to his office (provided it's private, if you need that) and a "Honey: I can't wait till you get home. My panties are sopping wet." Or "I'm so horny and my vibrator isn't doing it for me; I need you!" You can bet that he's going to blow off or rush through whatever overtime might have been in the offing (if he is the type who stays at work when he has a horny chick to come home to, what on earth are you doing with him in the first place?).If you're reluctant to be that explicit you can always use all the tried and true chick come hither numbers. That's OK. But if your man is tired or depressed, he can miss the non-verbal cues, or worse, ignore them. Ignoring a verbal invitation is not an option for most men: 99 times out of a hundred he's going to accept, no matter how tired or down he is.One final suggestion: a pre-arranged signal. One couple has a bride and groom from a wedding cake. When either one.
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